Abracadabra
Now and then, usually when there's nothing worth watching on TV (or, since I don't own a TV, the wall), my mind wanders into a twilight realm where the paths I've walked are traced back and I'm reminded why I'm here and how things came to be so.
When you're in deep with a field like computer science, it can be hard to remember what it was that first brought you here and where you imagined it might take you.
The more my mind wandered, the more apparent the truth became.
When I was young, I loved my magic set. I had cards, dice, mirrors, boxes, handkerchiefs and a black plastic magic wand with two white ends. A fairly meagre array of disappointing stocking fillers when taken on face value.
But the real pleasure came from the power these simple objects allowed me to wield. I suddenly had the ability to change perception and convince the unenlightened that I could take shortcuts through reality and conjure up the impossible.
I acknowledge I'm being somewhat over-enthusiastic here, but this is what happens when one drinks rather too much coffee and spends too much time staring at the wall.
A computer gives that same rush of excitement. Whenever something flits across the screen in a computer game or a message from a friend on the other side of the world appears on screen in pseudo-realtime, we gasp in amazement that the impossible has been tamed.
But I was never content with being a member of the unenlightened audience, fickle and ignorant of the secrets hidden in the staggering complexity contained within the beautiful simplicity of an innocuous beige box. I wanted to be the magician, pulling the strings, and controlling the magic.
And so, as I sat on the brink of defeating the wall in a stare-out competition, the truth became clear.
Control.
That's what it was. A computer provides me with a universe in which I am God and everything (in theory) is under my complete control. If something is out of place, I have the power to put it right. If there is a void, I can conjure up something which fills it.
So there we are. Being a computer programmer is like being a Master of the Universe. (I don't know what a psychologist would have to say about that but the perspective definitely boosts my ego.)
When you're in deep with a field like computer science, it can be hard to remember what it was that first brought you here and where you imagined it might take you.
The more my mind wandered, the more apparent the truth became.
When I was young, I loved my magic set. I had cards, dice, mirrors, boxes, handkerchiefs and a black plastic magic wand with two white ends. A fairly meagre array of disappointing stocking fillers when taken on face value.
But the real pleasure came from the power these simple objects allowed me to wield. I suddenly had the ability to change perception and convince the unenlightened that I could take shortcuts through reality and conjure up the impossible.
I acknowledge I'm being somewhat over-enthusiastic here, but this is what happens when one drinks rather too much coffee and spends too much time staring at the wall.
A computer gives that same rush of excitement. Whenever something flits across the screen in a computer game or a message from a friend on the other side of the world appears on screen in pseudo-realtime, we gasp in amazement that the impossible has been tamed.
But I was never content with being a member of the unenlightened audience, fickle and ignorant of the secrets hidden in the staggering complexity contained within the beautiful simplicity of an innocuous beige box. I wanted to be the magician, pulling the strings, and controlling the magic.
And so, as I sat on the brink of defeating the wall in a stare-out competition, the truth became clear.
Control.
That's what it was. A computer provides me with a universe in which I am God and everything (in theory) is under my complete control. If something is out of place, I have the power to put it right. If there is a void, I can conjure up something which fills it.
So there we are. Being a computer programmer is like being a Master of the Universe. (I don't know what a psychologist would have to say about that but the perspective definitely boosts my ego.)
[ Entry posted at: Wed 01 Mar 2006 23:12:03 GMT | 2 comment(s)... | Cat: Philosophical ]
Wedge writes:
Control is the focus of our lives. We all believe we are 'in control', but any control is relative. Even the most experienced computer user is still occasionally fallible. Even the leaders of the world make mistakes and tend to lose control eventually.
But you're right, magic and programming are two forms of (fairly limited) control and I can understand the appeal of CS for that sort of thing.
My outlook is not one focused around control, however, I believe in freedom. There is a crucial difference: control is all about having power within an existing set of rules, freedom is having the power to bend or even ignore those rules.
I suppose, looking at it from the other point of view, that perhaps freedom is the ultimate form of control. If you believe you are truly free, you believe that you have full control of your life. This is never the case.
A very interesting post, Sean, thanks for giving me an insight into how you express your desire for control.
[ Thu 02 Mar 2006 09:00:26 GMT ]
Sean Handley writes:
*bows*
Glad you enjoyed it, dude. And thanks for the intelligent comment :)
It's nice to know my thoughts aren't just drifting off into cyberspace.
[ Thu 02 Mar 2006 09:52:44 GMT ]