I'm in love. It's been a while since it was requited.
Sorry for any laughing/smiling/happiness this may have caused and undue worry associated with the above. I'll try and tone it down. When I'm with Kate, my mouth starts to hurt from smiling all the time. Every second we're together, I'm happy. Every second we're apart, I want us to be together again. I appreciate that this is massively slushy and probably rather out of character for me. Maybe I'm getting a bit fed up of being miserable all the time. Or being balanced but never really loving life. It's time to live at the edges of life again, I think. I may be depressed more often (although I think that's mostly to do with the circumstances of how we got together more than anything to do with her) but I'm also much happier.
The title comes from Swansea Uni's very own Stevie Davies' Impassioned Clay which I read last year. The main character, Olivia, is discovering her attraction to her close friend Faith who is kinda oblivious (and broadly heterosexual). It struck a chord with me, the way that they were so close and hanging around all the time and Olivia feels so strongly but can't do anything at all because it would destroy their friendship and everything. I over-relate to everything in these situations. It's hilarious. Kinda. Maybe it's also a bit tragic. I don't know. Anyway, I'm happy. This can't be a terrible thing.