Splish Splash

Savvy Steve Saved Svelt Sven
from Seventy-five Savage Sieves
at a Service Station in Seville.

That is all.

I can't help but notice how the Tesco money-machine has marketed new breeds of super-convenient consumer pits. We have Tesco Express, Tesco Extra, Tesco Metro, Regular Tesco. When are we due Tesco Lite? Tesco Extra Cold? Tesco With Lime? Tesco Mach III Turbo?

How about Tesco Inferno, where the aisles are filled with flashing lights and pumping disco tunes? Or Tesco Extreme, where you have two minutes to get in and out before the staff chase you out with paintball guns?

Meaningless marketing hype. Gotta love it. 

Beware. The following entry deviates from my usual blogging style and could probably be regarded as emo. Unless you're prepared to put up with some significant self-pity, I'd stop reading now.

I woke up crying this morning. As soon as I opened my eyes, I could feel the tears welling up inside. I can't remember the last time I cried. How long has it been now? For how long have I felt so numb?

I don't feel close to anyone. Not truly close. I feel to have a lot of social boundaries and I hate it. This has been a problem forever, probably because of damaged confidence as a result of primary school bullying.

My thoughts have been so dark recently. I've felt worse than I have for a long time. It's not entirely clear why. Probably a number of reasons, as usual. But yeah. Not feeling happy. That's the general message here.

Most of the time I just get on with my life and try not to let anything bother me. Now and then, though, the bottle gets full. The straightjacket comes off. And I experience the bizarre combination of feeling awful and liberated at the same time. Funny, that.

I'm pondering whether to actually hit the submission button on this entry or just to let the words disappear and be glad I got them out. But no. It feels like forever since I've said anything to anyone which I felt mattered.

I think I'll head to Rhossili for the day. Blow some of these cobwebs away.

Here's a great new baggy-pants style prank I've written.

All you need to do is catch an unsuspecting Windows user afk and run this sneaky little hack. Et voila! Every key has been mapped to 'L' or 'O'.

To remove, just navigate to the relevant section using regedit and delete the key manually - info is in the file.

EDIT: A one-click removal hack is here.

EDIT: Disclaimer: Be careful not to lock yourself/someone else out of the computer! Use at your own risk.

Happy LOLing! :D

____________________
Note: Needs a reboot, and is somewhat thwarted by password login. A bonus if you know their password is to change it to the equivalent in LOLese before the reboot. Yes, I'm bored.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/5246754.stm?ls

This is an old, old link but I just re-discovered it today and thought I'd share. It's pretty :-)

http://www.e-sheep.com/delta/heartofthesun/index.html

Wow!

Jenny's moved out of the house, leaving Kate free to move all her stuff into the upstairs room. We've been going through all the things she left to be thrown or given to charity and I found this little beauty:

Looks pretty with my IntelliRat parked on top of it. And it has a built-in calculator. Neat-o! 

But why is the rum gone to my head?

The Whyleycue* this weekend was a great laugh. Trampolining, cricketing, fire and water. Oh, yes. And rum. Lots of rum. [Pictures]

Also, something that's becoming increasingly apparent: The conversational nature of modern food packaging.

I bought a Sharwood's Noodle Box and an Innocent Smoothie and began reading the (rather copious) volume of (rather chatty) text printed on them. It's a novel experience to be able to chat to your food and drink but it seems to be getting rather popular. The smoothie I had for breakfast this morning told me how fascinating it thinks triangles are and that my mango and passion fruit breakfast drink contained no trumpets.

To be honest, I quite like this. It's a tad surreal, sure, but I think it carries a certain level of charm. I'm curious to see what other foodstuffs boast such charismatic exteriors and truly hope I see the day I can have a (none one-sided) conversation about the meaning of life with a can of lager.

____________________
*Whyleycue n. The annual barbecue/piss-up at Chris Whyley's house, celebrating graduation.

Bah, that's the third time this week!

I start chatting to someone about something and they say "I know. I read it in your blog."

Perhaps I should blog less and save more for conversation.

Google "<your name> needs" and see what the first result is. Apparently, I need 5 cakes.