BOOM BANG CRACKLE Crackle crackle (fireworks shoot up into the air and expolode.)
INTRODUCING the greatest and most powerful new chip out of INTEL's Microporcessor Labs: The Potato Chip.
Finally, with much fanfare, the newest upgrade to the best selling Pentium processor is released. The Potato Chip uses the latest in biochemical and electonic engineering. This newly developed organic microprocessor outshines the previous generation.
The Potato Chip has 100% more speed, 100% more memory, 1/10th the heat generation and 100000% more starch then the traditional 200Mhz PentiumPro Chip.
The new Potato Chip will soon be available in several flavors: Standard for the genaric PC, Barbique for those engineers and scientists who need an extra kick, Cajun for secretaries so that the engineers can drool over it, sour- cream and onions for the very low end user, and Low Sodium for the laptop market.
Soon a modified version of the Potato Chip will be released for the Very High End Computing sector. The new chip will be used in powerful parallel and supercomputer systems. The chip will have a slightly modified shape, color, and will be stackable. This project is code named Pringles.
Intel is beating out Motorola by two months for its own new chip: The Tortilla Chip. Industry insiders believe that the marketing hype for the Tortilla chip is overblown. Motorola's new chip is just too late and too underpowered compared to the Intel processor. In addition, the Tortilla is completely incompatible with the Potato Chip and is based upon a very different technology.
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