If Restaurants Worked Like Microsoft

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Patron: Server!

Server: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Server. What seems to the the problem?

Patron: There's a fly in my soup!

Server: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.

Patron: No, it's still there.

Server: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.

Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.

Server: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?

Patron: A SOUP bowl!

Server: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?

Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that got to do with the fly in my soup?!

Server: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?

Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!

Server: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?

Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??

Server: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.

Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?

Server: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.

Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the check. I'm running late now.

[Server leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.]

Server: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.

Patron: This is potato soup.

Server: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.

Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.

[Server leaves.]

Patron: Server! There's a gnat in my soup!

 

The check:

Soup of the Day £5.00

Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day £2.50

Access to support £1.00