Luser (8)

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LUSER(8) LUSER(8)

NAME

Luser - process to control the clueless induhviduals who (mis)use computer systems, peripheral devices and system administrators. Word play on "loser" and "user".

SYNOPSIS

Luser [-d] [-g<level> [-s] <lusername>

DESCRIPTION

Luser is the primary tool a system administrator uses to manage end-user requests. This powerful tool can actually cause the specified user to per-form actions as specified by the flags.

With no flags, luser deletes every running process owned by the specified <lusername>

OPTIONS

-d

Disk reclamation mode. Remove all files in the home directory of <lusername>

-g<level>

Grovel mode. Causes the specified luser to make an act of contrition to the sysadmin for past sins. The <level> indicates the severity of the contrition:

LEVEL

0 User makes a sincere apology and promises to never do it again.

1 User buys sysadmin a large quantity of sysadmin's favorite beverage.

2 User signs over ownership of his/her car to sysadmin.

3 User resigns from the company after writing a long letter of apology detailing his/her failings.

4 User commits ritual suicide by sucking on a power strip and grounding himself to a conduit.

NOTES

Sysadmins are encouraged to use the -s option as a way to smarten up the world's user base. Use the -g option at level 4 outside the confines of the machine room. The more lusers that witness the act, the better.

SEE ALSO

sysadmin(1)

BUGS

Occasionally, the luser may survive the effects of luser -g4. In that event, a second invocation of the command will usually prove to be fatal.